Friday, July 23, 2010


Ok, so as my dad always says "I reserve the right to change my mind." Getting out and connecting/reconnecting with real life people is hard and only happens once in a great while. I'm waiting until PL has health insurance again before taking her to church, or any kind of public "touch me" setting other than close family. Yes, I am germ paranoid. I know my immune system is weak, therefore I assume my daughter's is as well. Health insurance should kick in at the beginning of August, so only one more week, woohoo! In the mean time I've come back to ramble. This specific entry has not real point. I can complain, I can always complain, but I dont want this to be a 100% negative blog - that gets old fast.

PL turned 10 months old the other day. I still feel like a totally unprepared and inadequate mother. I know nothing, seriously, nothing. I take the tiny bits of information the family doctor gives me every 2 to 4 months and glean all I can from it. Then I get my once a month "your baby updates" from various brand name baby products. I dont have time, nor the desire to read multiple parenting books, though finding one on development might be helpful. I already know she's behind in developmental skills and such. Why? Because I dont know what the H I'm supposed to be doing with her. She's not crawling, she's not standing on her own, nor walking. She's hardly rolling over, and only from tummy to back. PL would rather not be on her tummy. I really dont think she'll ever crawl, she wont stay on her tummy long enough to learn. We finally accomplished the Cheerios hurtle. After I have put 2 or 3 in her mouth, she'll make an effort to pick them up and feed herself. Occasionally I think she'd be better of in day care, at least she might LEARN something, but I still dont like it. So I guess I will figure it out as I go and hope PL figures the rest out on her own. .... Is that an acceptable philosophy? It feels pretty weak to me.

I'm not looking forward to this weekend ... complaining? Yeah, kinda, sorry. FF works Saturday which means the same ol' same ol' for me. I tried to get together with a good friend who lives an hour away, but that fell through. The other semi-local friend has the kids this weekend, and for some reason "the kids" mean "no-can-do." So once again my weekend is flopping before it even starts. Though Sunday if FF isnt too tired & cranky we might drive up to the big city to look at tuxes for the wedding ... and go to the ice cream shop next door. Yup, tuxes is only an excuse for really good ice cream. =) ... the corn looks good. Have I mentioned I'm a farm girl? Ooooo! Let's talk about cake! My little town actually has a professional cake baker lady that does these amazing big-city expensive-wedding cakes! I'm so surprised she's in this town! Must be because of her husband's job, maybe family? Anyway ... I couldnt resist pulling up her webpage & FB page. OH MY GOODNESS ... I am in LOVE with the flavors & the fillings. So much so that I really want to talk to FF about dropping our current cake lady -- who is the mother of his best friend from high school. Ouch - that's a bit too rude for me. I **want** the cake, but for friendship reasons I dont think we can politely cancel, even though nothing has been decided yet. We have already asked her to do the cake. Did I mention that this cake would be dumped out of a plastic pouch? Ugh. So big-city cake with it's enticing and delectable flavors will have to wait ... Can I buy myself a cake for my birthday? A sheet cake -- with 3 layers of cake and 2 layers of filling, is only $40. ;) I've only got 7 months until my birth

I'm done here for the day ... and the weekend. Be safe, it's hot out there! Have a good one.


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