Again!

He did it again. Again! We just had this huge discussion/argument/sob fest (for me anyway) last night about how I feel and that I havent a clue how to be a mommy, I never took any child development classes, never had an interest in kids ... til I had one. I specifically told him that when I ask him if he'd like to feed PL a bottle or baby food it's me BEGGING & PLEADING for help! That's the only unoffensive way I've found to ask him for help, otherwise he's on the defensive. His response to it was "Huney, I didnt know that, next time just ask and I'll be glad to help." Whatever! It sounded good then ...

Today I've been struggling to get one hour of office work done. That's it, I just need one hour. I sent FF a text (btw, it's day #4 of his 4 day) asking what he was doing. His response: "thinkin' bout a nap. u?" I told him I was trying to work but PL wouldnt nap and can he come play with her for a little bit, no one else is here. His response: "im wooped huney. and im not makin excuses." Whatever! I asked you for help, damnit! And now, after all this (reference to last nights big discussion and "just ask") you STILL dont help me! What the hell is wrong here!?!? I dont care if you're tired, I'm tired too, cant you see that! I dont get a 4 day! I dont even get a 1 day!

There was no Daddy day this week because apparently he's lost interest. Today was supposed to be Daddy day anyway. So, now PL is napping, thank goodness. And I have my hour ... and I'm fuming ... and hurt. More hurt than anything, because even when I ask I dont get help. That is why I dont ask. It doesnt matter, the outcome is the same either way.